Wednesday, March 12, 2008
You've Got Your Hands Full
That's the comment I get the most from complete strangers whenever I leave the house with my kids in tow. It usually ticks me off, because I asume they're trying to tell me that I'm not handling things well. I really hate it when I feel that somebody is telling me that I'm not doing my job right. Don't you know that I'm perfect! (I'm so totally not perfect. I just have issues with other people lacking confidence in me. major issues. we just won't go there.)
Anyway, I get most of my comments from older people. You know, the ones that know EVERYTHING because they had children of their own 20-30-40 plus years ago. "that baby needs a hat on" "don't let her stand up in the cart" "where are your socks" "she's hungry" or "she needs a nap". I'm so glad that total strangers can look at my children for 2 seconds & know exactly what they need. Now, I think I'm a pretty good mom & most of the time my kids do have socks on or something covering their heads, but you've had those days when the fight is just not worth it & you'd rather get to the grocery store before lunch or nap time.
Well, on my last trip to the grocery store, I had a little old lady that felt the need to mention to me that I had my hands full. And as she laughed at me while I stooped over to put both the girls back in the car grocery cart & get them buckled in so that we could get the cart out to the parking lot (because both of them just had to get out once we got to the checkout), I realized that maybe I shouldn't take it as a negative comment. I'm doing just fine & I don't need the approval of strangers to confirm that. Maybe they're just mentioning it because they miss those days themselves. The days when they were so involved with little ones.
I've been struggling with Sadie lately. Yesterday was bad. Real bad. When I ask her to do something that she doesn't want to, she yells at me, hits me & throws toys at me. She is constantly doing things that she knows are not allowed & when I try to punish her for it, we get into the yelling, hitting & throwing toys again. So, today started with some Supernanny tactics. When she unbuckled her arms from her carseat during the ride home from dropping Dad off at work (car troubles), I told her that she was going in timeout once we got home. Now, normally I would just let it go because by the time we get home she's behaving nicely again. Not this time. I kept my word & she was mad! But after the 5 minutes, she was more than ready to offer an apology, I had her attention & could explain car safety to her & we gave each other hugs & kisses. And, the morning has gone really well. She hasn't been back in timeout yet. I'm feeling positive.
So I'm trying to change my attitude. Not to feel mad all the time because I'm constantly juggling little ones. It would sure help me a lot if winter would be over & the sun would shine on me a little more, but I can do it. With or without mother nature's help. My kids are not horrible. They're actually really good kids. I've just got to do my job to keep them that way. And I've got to fill my house with more love.