Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Thoughts on Feeling Pretty


This right here is the reason why I've been growing my hair out.  This wavy, curly hair right here.  :)  I still want it to be quite a bit longer, but I am loving where it's getting.

I'm not really into fashion.  I've never wanted to get wrapped up in spending money on myself.  Shopping with kids is not fun.  Plus I just don't think about it because my mind is already filled to the max with sewing ideas.  Lately I have been enjoying curling my hair, wearing earrings, or buying myself a new top every now & then.  I'm worth it.  It makes me feel happy, and I'm not going overboard.

I wonder if I'm like most women.  Is it the norm to more easily be able to list off the things you don't like about yourself rather than the things that you love about yourself?  Why is it so easy to focus on the bad, or the perceived bad?

I have been thinking about feeling pretty lately.  I think it came about because Sadie has started randomly telling me that I'm pretty.  She'll say, "Mom, you are SO pretty." and she'll give me the sweetest hug.  Maybe she's learned this from Dylan.  He tells me that I am beautiful constantly.  He tells me in the morning, when he calls me on the phone mid day, when he gets home at night, and before we go to bed.  He tells me when I look like a mess & he tells me when I'm dressed up for a date.  And he says it with such surprise in his voice.  Like he's looking at me for the first time & he can't believe it.  It's really sweet & I often times don't really believe him.  I think he's saying it just to make me feel good.  So I'll respond, "That's nice of you to say."

I'm realizing lately & it's hitting me over the head like 'how could I have been so dense for so long?'...that the surprise in his voice when he tells me that I'm pretty is not at all like the surprise of seeing me for the first time.  It's the surprise of seeing me for the millionth time.  He looks at me & he sees me inside & out....and he loves what he sees because he loves me.  Me.....everything that makes up me.

I really loved the talk given by Thomas S. Monson, the president of my church, at the Relief Society session of conference earlier this month.  He said:  "Charity...is accepting people as they truly are. It is looking beyond physical appearances to attributes that will not dim through time. It is resisting the impulse to categorize others."

I feel most pretty when I am at home with the people that I love & that love me the most.  I want to try to always see myself the way they see me & not through my own critical eyes.  I want to see myself the way my creator sees me.  “The Lord seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the Lord looketh on the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7)

Are you with me?  Let's remember the things that make us truly beautiful & share our hearts & our talents & our goodness with the world.  We are all pretty.  It's true.  :)

26 comments:

Mrs. Sassy Crafter said...

I loved President Monson's talk too! He is always so right, and so funny. It is true what you say, it is so easy to find faults than to see all the good things each one of us has to offer, I have learned to look at people from the inside out not the outside in, cause physicall appearance with time goes away, but what is in someone's heart is what remains....Have a happy Tuesday!

Jess said...

Well said! I teared up when I read what you said about your husband because mine does that too, and most of the time I brush him off, but we should believe our husbands more! ;) Love your hair, btw!

Katie @ Not Just Decorating said...

What a great topic. It is so great to feel good about yourself. It seems like it is hard sometimes when society is always pushing it out there that everyone should fit a certain definition of "perfect." Good for you for coming closing to accepting yourself as beautiful the way God made you. I am always trying to work at this myself.
Thanks for sharing this and have a wonderful day!

Sarah said...

I agree, well said! I've been thinking these things over lately as well. Why do so many feel that we need the biggest home, the prettiest things and the fanciest cars to be happy? And sadly, why do I feel as though I need to look and dress a certain way in order to be happy? Here's to following your own heart, I thing that is what makes a person happy. :)

Elle Belles Bows said...

Wonderful post! I too struggle with making that time for myself. I also have a hard time taking a comment without an excuse rather than a simple Thank You in return. ie. "You look great today!" (hubby) "Are you kidding? My hair is a mess!" (me) Thanks for the reminder that our beauty shines from the inside out. Thanks too for the quote from the president of your church! Kerri

Erin L said...

I've been feeling a similar way lately. I have only a handful of accessories that I like and I really don't like shopping too much. Its been a slow process but I'm finally getting into my own style and I like it and it makes me feel happy to just feel comfortable with that. Thanks for the post.

A. said...

Thank you, thank you, thank you for this post. Admittedly, I've been going the opposite direction lately - DH had to move a few weeks ahead of me & the girls, so I have been hungry for distraction, and that has come all too easily in the form of fashion magazines & shopping. Which is so weird, because I have *never* been like that - but am finding it all too easy to get sucked into. And, like you said - it's nice to have a new top from time to time - to look pulled together - to take care of yourself and like the way you look - but it's all too easy for me to forget to take care of what's on the inside, too. I loved that talk as well; thanks for the reminder. xo

Ariane said...

That was so well written! I think it is easy for moms to put themselves on the backburner, but it's important - I think - to always feel pretty. Especially, I'm learning, when you have daughters. They base their self image off of what they see growing up and I never want my daughter to look at herself and think that she should be different. Thanks Candace! I loved reading this!

chanel said...

best post ever!!! these are my favorite posts- these are the reasons I LOVE YOU! i love how you think about things and figure it out and BECOME even cooler-prettier-CANDACE. you make me better too, cause you get me thinking. Ryan is EXACTLY like Dylan, only Im not nice and say, "thats nice of you", i usually say "You're CRAZY!" but what you said made sooooo much sense- you are seriously brilliant. love the spiritual insight on this as well. you're amazing and i love you!!!

and of course your wavy beautiful hair is rockin!

lilyzmama said...

Awww you brought a little tear to my eye with your post today. The feeling of total acceptance is the most beautiful thing that one can give or recieve. A while back I have tried to implement giving and taking complements more to heart. There are times when you see a frind and think Wow she looks great, but neglect to tell her.That is a missed oppertunity, why not say it and make someones day. On the flip side of that I have tried to recieve compliments as well, instead of say oH no I look a mess today or someting of that nature, a simple Thank you works much better and in time you really do become thankful. Thank you Candance for sharing today =)

Rhianna said...

You are such an inspiration. :) Thanks for the awesome post.

{lizzythebotanist} said...

great post, candace. thanks for sharing. now, when are we going to get together?!

Jenn said...

So sweet! I loved President Monson's talk, too. It was a great wake-up call to think about the way we view ourselves and others!

yellowmum said...

You inspire me. You always have. Thanks for a great post.

ladydazy said...

This is such a great and uplifting post. I feel the same way as you as to why we see what we don't like and don't see what we do like about ourselves. Being beautiful inside is more important than being beautiful on the outside.

Weatherbee ;) said...

What a wonderful post. :)

~Teresa

aPearantly sew said...

What a great post! I also teared up when you were talking about your husband. Thank you for sharing this. Oh, and I do love your hair!

sjones said...

Did you read my mind? I have been not liking myself lately and this post inspires me... Thanks

Mandi said...

Loved this post! thanks for your sweet thoughts. You are absolutely right! :)

zarah said...

wow, you almost made me cry.
i get it. i feel ugly and awful all the time. even when the hubby compliments me i have trouble receiving his nice words. i don't have kids yet, but i have a gazillion students and they are God's way of comforting me and holding me. they also tell me i'm pretty all the time, even if i don't believe them.

thanks for being honest and just say it. it's good to know one is not alone in a matter. and i do believe that it's Him alone that makes us pretty.

:)

zarah said...

p.s.: you are beautiful :)

Ginger Snaps! said...

heather pointed to this post, and I'm glad I headed over. thanks for sharing. you've got a wonderful someone who sees you, so lucky...

Michelle said...

That's a nice post Candace. Dylan is a great guy!

abby said...

i love this post. thanks for saying what we're all thinking. and your hair is awesome!

Brian, Emily, Charlie, and Lucy said...

Thank you for this -- it is wonderful!

Leah Campbell Badertscher said...

This is such a lovely post - and you are so lovely, too!

You're blog gives off such a great fresh, clean, happy, pretty vibe - thank you!

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